NECCO Wafers - The Food Of Heroes

This happened in the early 1960’s, when I was 5 years old.

My older brother was 8, and used to run around the woods near our home with a group of boys that called themselves ‘The Snipers Club.’  I doubt that any of them knew what a sniper was, or actually did.  I am pretty sure they got it from an episode of Combat on TV (“Starring Vic Morrow and Rick Jason…”).  It was a mysterious and powerful name, so it suited them just fine. 

I wanted to follow them everywhere they went, but was mostly not allowed access to the important matters of 8-year-olds roaming the primeval forests near our suburb of Northern Virginia. 

This Summer day, however, was different.

My big brother actually came looking for ME.  “Ya gotta help us!” he said, near panic.  “The Eagles have challenged us to a tree-climbing contest.  We want you to climb the tree for the Snipers!”  

It was well known that I was the best tree-climber in the neighborhood.  My Mom would often get calls from the neighbors.

“Mrs. Z, your son has climbed up a tree in our front yard!”

--“Yes, he likes to climb trees alright.”

“He is about 60 feet up there—Should we call the Fire Department?”

--“No, he’ll come down when he’s good and ready.  No sense endangering a Fireman to pry him loose.  He can climb a tree better than anyone I ever heard of.”

After a while, the neighbors stopped calling her.  Sometimes they waved.  That was common knowledge in our neighborhood. 

The Eagles were from the next neighborhood over, and knew nothing of this. 

When I got there the Eagles and the Snipers were lined up facing each other at the designated clearing.  They chose an oak tree with easily reachable branches.  For us, they chose a pine tree with its first branches 30 feet off the ground.  It was then that I realized I had forgotten to change to my tree-climbing jeans.  I was still wearing shorts. 

The Eagles were incredulous.  “You’re gonna let this runt climb the tree for you?” they asked.   “That’s crazy—Yer gonna lose!”   But it was too late to make other arrangements.

At the countdown, “3, 2, 1, GO!”  I and the Eagles’ champion raced for our trees.  I shimmied up the pine tree while the Snipers and the Eagles yelled and jumped up and down.  I had to touch the first branch on the Pine and make it back down first to win.  The Eagles guy had to touch a branch on the Oak that was the same height. 

I shimmied up as fast as I could, clamping with legs then pulling with arms.  When I got to the branch, the Eagles guy was lower than me, but not by much.  I slid the bark off the sides of that tree on the way down, tarring the insoles of my sneakers, and jumped the last 10 feet for the win.  The Eagles’ guy, hindered by the plentiful branches on the Oak, never had a chance. 

It was a humiliating defeat for the Eagles, and they skulked away through the trees to the sound of the Snipers’ howls of victory.  I was covered in pine sap and my legs were bleeding, but it was the most glorious day of my life—That is, until the next day.

My older brother found me after lunch.  “We have decided to give you a Medal and a Reward,” he told me solemnly, “for the way you beat the Eagles yesterday.  Come on out to the back yard.”  He stopped me before we turned the corner of the house.  “It’s supposed to be a surprise.  Don't tell them I told you."

So with my Dad filming on the Super 8, I stepped out of the line of solemn 7, 8, and 9-year-olds to receive my awards.  My brother wrote a speech for the occasion—I found his notes many decades later.  He could really write a speech even then!    He pinned a plastic Sheriff’s star on my T-shirt, and gave me a roll of NECCO Wafers.

From then on, I have always thought of NECCO Wafers as ‘The Food Of Heroes.’   From time to time, whenever I am full of doubt or crushed by failure, I will get myself a roll of NECCO Wafers and solemnly crunch them one at a time until the roll is gone, just like I did to that first roll of NECCO wafers so long ago.  By the end of the roll, my courage is restored.

I know they are mostly sugar and corn syrup.  I am certain that they are bad for my teeth, and have never helped me lose weight.  Some of the flavors I didn’t like when I was 5, don’t like now, and didn’t like in the time between.  It doesn’t matter.  NECCO Wafers are, for me, The Food Of Heroes, even the lime-flavored ones!  Do Heroes shrink from unpleasant things?  Of course not!  And so, whenever I get a roll of NECCO Wafers, I eat them all, just like I ate them when I was 5, exactly BECAUSE they are the Food Of Heroes. 

It’s a funny little story.  I am sure my older brother did not know the impact of what he was doing that day.  But that sheriff’s star and roll of candy, symbolizing thanks and honor for a difficult job well done, have had a lasting positive impact on me.  I hope my son has found something like it to restore his courage.  I hope the same for you too, Gentle Reader.

The last time I got a roll of Necco Wafers, I noticed that they are now labeled, “PRODUCED WITH GENETIC ENGINEERING.”  I am pretty sure that was not part of the recipe when I was 5, and it saddens me.  I will probably keep buying them from time to time.  Like Grandfather’s Axe, which is still Grandfather’s Axe even though the head has been replaced twice and the handle three times, NECCO Wafers will remain NECCO Wafers to me.  They are the eternal Food Of Heroes.