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The Skunk Whisperer

We have been getting our eggs up here from Suzie, who works in the office next door.  They are enormous, delicious eggs with rich, creamy whites and deep yellow yolks.  At CDN $4/dozen, a super deal!  I was running low on eggs and went over to put in an order for another dozen.
Suzie was annoyed.
"Something is up with my hens, and I don't know what!  They have stopped laying eggs in the hen house, and seem skittish.  It looks like they are hiding their eggs."

"Does this happen often?" I asked.

"Once in a while, and usually only with one hen," she replied, "but never all of them at once.  I'm going to see if I can coax our old dog into sniffing out the nests, and then we'll see what's doing."

Regretfully, I went to the supermarket and bought a dozen organic eggs.  They were CDN$5.00 a dozen, and not nearly as good.

The following week, Suzie had figured it out.  Or rather, her dog did.
"My old dog found the new nests in the hay, in the barn.  But he also tracked down a skunk that apparently dug a den under the barn.  He got a nose-full and is one miserable pup!  Stinky too--" she made a face, "but better him than me.  I got the skunk cornered in the barn and shut him in, but didn't know how to get rid of it.

By this time, all activity had stopped in the store, and customers and employees were gathered around.  Someone asked, "So is the skunk still there? What did you do?"

"Well naturally, I waited until my husband got home, and told _him_ to deal with it.  That's what men are for, after all!  But he wiggled out of it."

"How?"

"He said, 'All we have to do is call the Skunk Whisperer.  The Skunk  Whisperer will get rid of it.'"

Suzie is a jokester, and we thought at first she was pulling our legs, but she insisted it was true.

"The guy arrived in a pickup truck with a wire cage and an old blanket.  That was all.  Whenever I peeked into the skunk's corner, it would stamp its little front feet and start turning around.   But the Skunk Whisperer walked right up to the corner with his cage and blanket, and just talked to the skunk in a low, calm voice.  After a while, he made a gap in the barrier and set his cage down.  The little skunk waddled into the cage and waited patiently.  The Skunk Whisperer closed the door behind it, threw the blanket over the top, and took the skunk away."

I put in my order for another dozen eggs, unscented.  She is pretty sure the hens will have them laid by the beginning of next week.

There are a lot of unanswered questions here.  How did he become a Skunk Whisperer?  And why? 

"Oh its probably like everything else in BC," someone opined.  "They probably have a programme for it at Okanagan Community College.  You take 10 courses, spend $8000.00, write the exam, and then pay the government $250.00 for the Skunk Whisperer Certificate and you go into business.  That's how it works with Midwives, eh?"

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